January 22nd, 2004
107469779888602732
The saga continues
It’s been the second day in a row that I’ve pounded it at work. This no music, no breaks; no normal breathing gives me a pain in the neck, but I impressed my manager with mad progress. I even got a less thorough than usual checkover for my work (it may not have happened at all if I hadn’t asked).
I kinda feel like the good son, and guilty for it because my twin in seniority seems to draw misfortune for my every advance. He’s been working on the same project for longer than I have on any of mine (given a brief period of false completion). Whereas I work on three projects or more in a week, he seems fated to pore over the same Konami cell phone port, day after day. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t know the right words in English, but I feel like our manager is quite often more stern or exasperated with my partner than myself. Still, there’s a certain unmistakable tone in a person’s voice in any language that expresses frustration. I find that I form a lot of my opinions on myself professionally by comparison to others. It may be good to admire those more adroit than oneself to a small extent, but for the most part it has to be about the goals I’ve given and how well I accomplish them. There should be no shame in being the first to leave since I’ve finished all I was asked for the day.
I don’t take for granted being able to leave on a 12-hour day, but I wish I had the patience to stop for a real dinner. Unfortunately, the feeling of satisfaction and inner-quiet I get from watching my nightly Next Gen is just too great.
BTW – anyone know a nice webcounter that doesn’t involve some gaudy extra text to look at?
