Energize and drain

There are reasons to enjoy being back in the States. The friends, the cheap goods, the occasional microbrew or meatloaf. However, there are always about thirty thousand more reasons to enjoy being back in Japan. Either I’m becoming more sentimental with age, or the business trips are just becoming increasingly taxing. Whatever the reason, I am electrified as soon as I disembark from a plane coming home. The scents, the characters, the quiet, the way I stand above the crowds. The ritualistic courtesy from virtually every encounter, the innocent chuckling of adolescent boys on the train. I know you must get tired of reading it every time I return from overseas, but I never get tired of wanting to write about it. Japan is my home, and it is eternally getting better.

先週末はバレンタインでした。ロブの誕生日会と出張に対していろいろ準備してたからあまり考えなかったけど、とにかく起こりました。日本では習慣的に男性は女性からチョコレートをもらえます。アメリカに互いは小さなプレゼントを交換しますが、ほとんど恋人はやります。小学校のころに自分のクラスメートにカードを交換します。いつも人気の女の子からバレンタインをもらえたらドキドキした。

今年立派なチョコレートをもらえました。久しぶりにちょっとドキドキした。恋かな。

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about fatigue. It’s a subject of deep concern because the level of fatigue I feel is so overpowering I often feel in the morning like I’m going to vomit. It can’t be as simple as one particular thing, there must be a confluence of reasons mitigating to drag me down like this. I’m making a concerted effort not to be stressed out by work. I’ve been avoiding drinking during the week. I’ve been running. I’ve been playing guitar and studying music. I’m not sure what more I can do… but I suppose I need to do something, because I can’t go on like this. There’s too much potential in my body and mind to be held back. Where is my love? What are my priorities? How can I get my affairs in order?

Catching up

I believe I have made it through my journal backlog all the way up to the my European trip, save a copy entries on the back of random napkins and flyers. I hope to round those up in the next couple of weeks, but for now I just have all that thinking from the end of the year to type up and I should be solid.

In the meantime photographs from Berlin and Amsterdam are finished, so you can start with those or rummage through the blog archives from last August to December.